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Christmas cookies are my archenemy

I decided that I would carry on the tradition of baking Christmas cookies with my daughter.  I should have known this was not a good idea!  (It did make for some awesome memories) I am now sitting here with 7 batches of cookies that don't even look appetizing to me!  You would think this would deter me from munching on them, but no, it doesn't.  I have said from the beginning (or maybe somewhere in the middle) that a cookie now and then is not going to cause me to gain back 160 pounds, but those little round pieces of deliciousness are tempting and evil!!  I am only 17 pounds away from my goal now and I don't want to gain it all back.  I am struck with this terror every time I eat anything!  (It doesn't stop me) but I reassure myself...everything in moderation.  Obviously the easiest way to avoid temptation is to stay away from temptation, so now it is time for me to plate up these delicious cookies and pass them out to the neighbors!!

Elephant stuffed in a peanut can

I read an article that was posted by a fellow WLS Blogger "The World According to Eggface" about a man who complained that he had to stand the entire flight because the person next to him was too fat.  This infuriates me because I have a feel that the person was just like me on my last flight where the seat is majorly uncomfortable and squeezing into my hips, the belt is too tight but I still fit into that seat damn it!!  Now I don't know all the details, the man could have been morbidly obese and taking up two seats, but I don't think any flight attendant would have let that man stay on that plane if that was the situation.  The skinny guy in this situation claimed he was forced to stand for a 7 hour flight.  Here is the link to the article, but the comments on the article amazed me the most.  People are petrified that by touching a fat person they are going to get so fat they are going to have to be rolled to work themselves.  Wake up jerks!!  And as for the whole "it's not a medical condition, you just need to stop eating"  concept, yeah I tried that.  See when you get to a certain weight, your metabolism slows down, well I don't need to explain.

My point is that people who are heavy, overweight, obese, etc, are discriminated against on a daily basis.  I am almost half the size I was a year ago and I still get dirty looks.  I am happy with how I look.  I am fit, I exercise, I love the way I feel. But it has taken me years to feel this way.  However, even after losing 160 pounds, I am still considered overweight. (To get to a healthy BMI I need to lose 17 more pounds) I tried every diet in the book before surgery and was even moderately successful.  (Especially when I took diet pills a.k.a. Rx speed, yeah that is healthy in the long term).  But that moment that I stopped and even thought about a mini m&m the weight came back!

When I flew, I wasn't even at my heaviest weight and I was mortified!  I could not wait to get off that airplane and hid from society.  I feel for the poor bloke in this article, not that A-H that had to stand for 7 hours, but for the obese guy who had to put up with that humiliation.  I think that the fact that the majority of American are overweight would make us all a little kinder to those who struggle with their weight, but no.  It is a sad world my friend!

WoW!! Where has the time gone?

It has been ages since I posted and all I can say to my many readers is I apologize!!  I will attempt to do better!

Since August (Really August?) things have been pretty steady!  The biggest hurdle I've had to overcome weight wise is that I had surgery on my foot and I have not gotten back to my running schedule!  Surgery was a lot rougher than I imagined, and recovery time was twice as long as originally anticipated. I guess I have bones of steel (per the doctor) and the pins they needed to insert did not want to go into the bone.  The process, which should have taken about 15 minutes, took over an hour and increased the pain and swelling. But, me and the toes are back up and running, literally!

Well...we were until I had to have semi-emergency surgery to removed an 11 cm (think newborn size head) cyst from my left ovary.  Luckily, the pain has been manageable and I have not lost a lot of training time for the half marathon relay in January.  I think I will still be able to run the 6.1 miles necessary not to let my partner down!

I don't have all the measurements, but I am down to an even 200 pounds as of yesterday!  I never thought I would ever get to this weight.  I believe this brings the total weight loss total to around 160 pounds since my heaviest weight 18 months ago.  I had pretty much leveled out until this latest loss, but an 11cm cyst weighs a lot!!

I love how I always make the promise to update my blog more often and then it seems like months go by before I post again! Anyway, I am making that promise yet again.

I haven't been posting much lately other than measurements because it seems like that is all I have had time for. In March we moved to Tucson and I have taken that opportunity for a much desired fresh start. I am now down to around 210 pounds, from 350 pounds this time last year. That is literally a person!! I have a whole new wardrobe since none of my other clothes fit. However, I am still having a hard time seeing myself as a "skinny person". I still see my old fat self in e mirror when I look at in the morning.

I am seeing the health benefits of this surgery though. For those who don't know, I made the final decision to have gastric bypass when I saw the cardiologist a year ago. I had an echocardiogram that came back with thickening (strengthening) of the left ventricle and two valve issues. I went in for my latest echocardiogram at the beginning of the month and I am excited to say that I questioned the doctor about the findings. They told me, and I quote, "you have a perfectly healthy 29 year old heart.".

In addition to the heart issues having resolved, I have also not used my inhaler since I had surgery with the rare exception of when I had an upper respiratory infection in March and eating of corn on the cob last week. Everyone also comments on how slow my pulse is, not too slow, but healthy enough they comment.

I also received my latest blood work and my cholesterol is finally within normal range. Even my good cholesterol is only low by one point! My A1C level is well within normal range and that is a great relief as well!

On the opposite side of the spectrum I am constantly reminded of how overweight I was. I have been having knee issues since June. It is very frustrating since I am not obese anymore. However, this is cause from years and years of being over weight. I learned that for every pound you lose, you take four pounds off your joints. I have been walking around with almost half a ton of extra weight on my joints. No wonder they are shot!! I have learned that it is going to take some time to strengthen my surrounding muscles to help support my knees.

There have been major ups and downs with this surgery. I don't get to eat an entire cake anymore, but I realize now that I was eating the cake because I hated the way I looked because I was fat and unhealthy. Self esteem is a vicious cycle and it is something everyone struggles with. I don't care if you are supermodel skinny or the heaviest man alive, everyone has something they want to change. It is how we deal with these feelings that we have the ability to change. I no longer turn to food for comfort. I have broken my cycle.

I have lost friends along the way, which is my biggest regret. I have changed and I have a high respect for myself now. I won't let people walk all over me. I am highly outspoken and I love myself. I am open and honest and I am not hiding behind my body anymore. Some people haven't been able to accept the new me and with some we just don't have the same things in common anymore. I miss my lost friends but I have accepted that sometimes we have to travel on separate paths.

I have started to allow myself some indulgences. I have lost the weight that the doctors have said I will lose. I have hit goal!! The best thing about hitting a goal is the opportunity to set a new goal. I still want to lose about 30 more pounds. I treat myself, however I have learned not to over indulge. I might have a cupcake one night but not every night with every meal. I will also account for it during the week by an extra workout or cutting out carbs the next meal. I am not perfect in this, but I am viewing food differently. I realize now that it isn't something to fear but something to respect.

Needless to say, I do not regret this decision. This has been the greatest choice I have ever made. It has been an exhilarating adventure and I am so happy that I made it!!

- Posted using BlogPress from my iPad

- Posted using BlogPress from my iPad

Location:Reflections

Road ID

My friend Lora recommend an awesome product to me and I have to share.  The product, Road ID (www.roadID.com), is a bracelet, anklet, necklace, or shoe tag that has emergency contact information on it.  The site is geared towards athletes, but it is a really awesome idea for anyone who has any kind of medical need.  I actually think it is a good idea for everyone to have regardless of medical need.  The point of the band is to give emergency medical responders the information they need to get in contact with someone if something were to happen to you.

I know most of us carry an ID on us when we go out, but ladies where do we put this ID?  In our purse!  What happens if you get separated from your purse? I have a medical alert card for my gastric bypass in my purse and I was thinking I was golden, but then I remember what happened after my car accident.  I was so flustered and if I didn't grab my purse before we went to the hospital, I wouldn't of had anything on me!  I was lucky to be conscious, but if you are in a car accident or something else happens and the EMT needs to get you to the hospital, they are not going to root around your car or probably even think to grab your purse.  Their number one priority is to get you to the hospital!! This band could save your life.

It was recommended to me that I carry a medical alert on me because of my surgery.  The ER needs to know that you have had bypass because they have to be careful about a couple of procedures that they preform.  In Flagstaff I wasn't worried about this because FMC had done my surgery and I assumed that they would have it in their system.  This is funny because, well because it just is.  FMC couldn't remember I had a corn allergy when I pregnant with Lilly and it was in BIG RED LETTERS across the door of my hospital room.

Anyway, I have looked at a lot of medical alert bracelets and such and I have never found one I liked until now.  I think I like this one because the price is right ($15.99 to $29.99 depending on the style) and they have interchangeable bands that you can buy ($1-$3 for the ones I bought).  I chose to get the interactive band that sets you up to a website that EMTs and the ER can access via a code on the back of your bracelet and you get the first year free for EACH bracelet you buy.  I bought the sport band to run in and another band for day to day.  So I get two free years and then it is only $10 a year for each additional year.  If you lose a band with the access code, they remove it from your account so no one can access your personal information.  I did this because I want to be able to update medications and phone numbers in the event something changes (like my ever changing cell phone number).

I received a coupon code from RoadID.com for $1 off  your next order.  So feel free to use it and share.  Coupon Number: ThanksKimberly5710022


 This concludes my rant!!

Running

Since I have discovered the joys of running, I have creaked my own blog all about it!!! Feel free to check it out, follow it, share it, etc...

http://runningmangan.blogspot.com/

May weights and measurements

Wow I guess I didn't realize how long it has been since I updated these!!

Current:
Weight: 215.2
Arms: 10"
Upper arm: 12.9"
Neck: 14"
Chest: 41"
Waist: 38.5"
Hips: 44.5"
Thighs: 24.5"
Calf: 14.5"

Differences since last time:
Weight: 18.8 pounds
Upper arm: 1.1"
Neck: 1"
Chest: 1.75"
Waist: 3.5"
Hips: 3.25"
Thigh: 1"
Calf: 1.25"

Total to date:
Weight: 119.4
Upper arm: 5.6"
Chest: 11.75
Waist: 13.5"
Hips: 16.5"
Thigh: 8.25"
Calf: 5.5"


- Posted using BlogPress from my iPad

The Easter Bunny is an evil, evil rabbit.

I have decided that the Easter Bunny (EB) is evil. Every year he brings around candy and chocolate for the mere purpose of making my butt bigger. He knows I cannot resist peanut butter Easter eggs covered in rich milk chocolate, sorry let me wipe the drool off the screen so I can continue. He walks around my house leaving colorful piles of jelly bean poop everywhere. You know what he takes away from all this? My self control!! For some reason I decided to try a piece of Lilly's Easter candy, hmmm no dumping, well let's try another piece, hmmm still ok. Apparently I am daredevil and didn't know it because I kept at it. You know what happened? Nothing, not a damn thing! I can tolerate sugars. Well shoot! There was my whole motivation for not eating sugar and my justification that I could keep it in the house. Not anymore!! I hope the food bank has a use for all the junk food in my house! Ok there isn't THAT much, but soon there will be none! The funny thing is when I am in the store or out and about, I have no desire for it. When I come into the house and know that there are cookies in the cookie jar (we don't actually HAVE a cookie jar) that is all I can think about!! So moral of the story? Don't keep the junk food in the house!!

The good news is that I took Lilly to Sesame Street Live! Last week and I could fit into the seat! I was so excited! There was even extra room! Also, I had to go buy new pants because my size 18 were too big!! This is even more exciting I. That I think I have hit my first plateau. I have been working out more and even started, gulp, running so I think I am gaining muscle, thus replacing fat with muscle. Speaking of running, I have also signed up for my first two half marathons. The first is in November at the Scottsdale/Tempe Women's Running Magazine Half Marathon. The second is the Arizona Rock 'n' Roll Half Marathon relay in January. I am also going to run a couple of 5k's this summer.


- Posted using BlogPress from my iPad

Weights and Measurements

Well, it has been another month!  I am now 13 weeks post surgery.  The good news is that I can eat chicken again!  This has made this whole process a lot easier!  I have gone from a size 28 pant to a size 18 and from a 28 top to a 14/16 top!! Well here are the numbers....

Weight: 234
Waist: 42"
Thigh: 25.5"
Leg: 15.75"
Arm: 14"
Wrist: 6.75"
Above Chest: 39.5"
Around Chest: 42.75"
Below Chest: 39.25"
Hips: 47.75"
Ankle: 10"

Difference since Last Month:
Weight: -25 pounds
Waist: -2"
Thigh: -1.75"
Leg: -1.75"
Arm: -1/2"
Wrist: no change
Above Chest: -1.25"
Around Chest: -1.75"
Below Chest: -1"
Hips: -4.25"
Ankle: -1/2"

Total Difference:
Weight: -100.6 pounds
Waist: -10"
Thigh: -7.25"
Leg: -4.25"
Arm: -4.5"
Wrist: -.75"
Above Chest: -8.5"
Around Chest: -10"
Below Chest: -9"
Hips: -13.25
Ankle: -1.5"

 Today

 September

Updated Skinny Bottle List

Skinny bottle l

Fit into an airplane seat and not have to ask for a seat belt extender

Go to a concert/show in Vegas and fit into the seat

Go into Target/Walmart/Old Navy and buy an outift not in the plus size department (I did this!! I bought pants and a couple shirts from Old Navy!)

Be able to sit in a chair and not worry if it will break (went to dinner with friends at Cracker Barrel and wasn't afraid to sit in the rocking chairs)

Be able to find a bathing suit that not only fits but looks great on

Be able to wrap a towel around me and have the edges overlap (not only my towels, but a hotel towel as well!!)

Be able to buy a bra at Victoria Secret

Be able to see my feet when I stand up

Not have to look at the maximum weight on a scale

Find a bracelet (preferable a diamond tennis bracelet) that will go around my wrist

Be able to find a watch in the woman's section that fits and not the men's section

Put on one of those horrible gowns in the doctor's office and it tie in the back and cover my butt!

Get on the Wii Balance Board and not have it tell me I have exceeded the maximum weight (I can even drink water and get back on and it not tell me that!!)


Run a half marathon


Run a 5k


Run a 10k

A much needed post!

Well it has been awhile since I posted more than just measurements, so here is my much needed update.

This has been an amazing adventure!  I have had some problems with keeping food down.  Right after Christmas I started vomiting after almost every meal.  The first thought that came to mind was that I had a blockage.  However, I worked with my nutritionist and was getting very frustrated that I could not find anything other than liquids that I could keep down.  I had started to lose hair because of the lack of nutrition especially protein.  I went and saw the doctor on Thursday and he suggested that I had irritated my stomach from vomiting and not accepting the fact that I could not handle chicken.  He thought that I had gotten into a cycle of vomiting because my stomach was so upset and raw that it wasn't able to process anything other than liquids.  He suggested that I go back to square one and start with a couple days of clear liquids, then full liquids, etc and that I go back on the omeprizol to help with the acid.

 I am now to point where I am able to eat almost anything.  In fact I have only vomited three times, twice with items that were banana flavored and once with something that had italian dressing.  I have now added bananas to my list of foods to stay away from!!  I am so happy to be able to eat!! I was assured that this wasn't a normal occurrence, so if you are considering surgery, rest assured that this probably won't happen to you!

I have also gotten a couple of weight loss surgery cookbooks.  I really like Eating Well After Weight Loss Surgery: Over 140 Delicious Low-Fat High-Protein Recipes to Enjoy in the Weeks, Months and Years After Surgery especially since it has adjustments for what stage you are post surgery.  The recipes looks really good!!  I also bought Before & After, Revised Edition: Living and Eating Well After Weight-Loss Surgery which has some really good protein shake recipes and a recipe for a sugar free cheesecake.  There is even a recipe in there for a protein shake that is supposed to taste like a Oreo blizzard.  The last one I bought, The Everything Post Weight Loss Surgery Cookbook: All you need to meet and maintain your weight loss goals (Everything Series) which I would not recommend, at least not for recipes.  There is some good post surgery information in there, however the recipes are not RYN friendly!  They call for things like honey and syrup which may cause dumping syndrome, so I refuse to even try them!

I have lost enough weight that I have been able to cross a couple things off my skinny bottle list, so I will post an updated list next!!  I have even dropped down three pants sizes!  I have been buying pants at Savers on Mondays.  You are asking yourself "Why Monday?" Well, at Savers they have a different color tag on sale for 50% off each week.  On Mondays they list the new tag for 50% off and the previous week's tag is only 99 cents!!  My only issue that I have is that since I am so tall it is difficult to find pants that are long enough for me.  I did "splurge" and bought a pair of $70 pants at Torrid for $11 on clearance.  They are long enough, but now they are a little big, not falling off my butt big, but baggy in the butt big!!

Despite all my problems and issues, I am really glad that I had the surgery.  I have lost around 75 pounds since I started this whole thing back in September!  

January Update

Well here is the latest numbers:

Today

DecemberSeptember

Weight: 259.4
Waist: 44"
Thigh: 27.25"
Leg: 17.5"
Arm: 14.5"
Wrist: 6.75"
Above Chest: 40.75"
Around Chest:  44.5"
Below Chest: 40.25"
Hips: 52"
Ankle: 10.5"

Differences:

Since Last Post:

Weight: 30.6
Waist: 3"
Thigh: 2.25"
Leg: 1"
Arm: 1.25"
Wrist: .25"
Above Chest: 2"
Around Chest:  3"
Below Chest: 2.25"
Hips: 5.25"
Ankle: 0

Total so Far:

Weight: -75.6 

BMI: -11.6

Waist: -8" 

Thigh: -5.5"

Leg: -2.5"

Arm: -4"

Wrist: -.75"

Above Chest: -7.25"

Around Chest:  -8.25"

Below Chest: -8"

Hips: -9"

Ankle: -1"